Why I Don’t Use Social Media For Business Communication

I didn’t really want to end the week on a somber note, but I wanted to share about my communication style, because this is part of what I think about when I manage careers (both mine and John’s) online.

Social media is great and it definitely has its uses. More and more I’m finding that casual conversations with “experts” are invaluable to writing research, as I dive into the wonders of virtual reality and economic instability for a story. Connecting with friends and family, also great.

What’s not so awesome, is the fact that social media was never designed with a celebrity or a creative professional in mind. I have very deep concerns about lines like this:

“For content that is covered by intellectual property rights, like photos and videos (IP content), you specifically give us the following permission, subject to your privacy and application settings: you grant us a non-exclusive, transferable, sub-licensable, royalty-free, worldwide license to use any IP content that you post on or in connection with Facebook (IP License). This IP License ends when you delete your IP content or your account unless your content has been shared with others, and they have not deleted it.” — Facebook Terms of Service



That doesn’t mean I think Facebook or Twitter or any other site out there is “bad.” What this tells me, is that these sites weren’t constructed with creative professionals (who craft their own content) and celebrities (whose image is their office) in mind. Content is invaluable to these services, but it’s the foundation of my career and many others. I have to be careful about where I publish anything online because to some publishers, posting a story on a website may count as “first time publication rights.” I have to be careful about what I post on Facebook because long-term? As my career continues to evolve, I want to ensure that I maintain record of my e-mails and I have a preferred method of conducting business communication for management purposes. Facebook is not it.

Facebook’s messaging system is fantastic for event coordination and the initial reach out — provided you’re contacting someone ON Facebook. But, one can’t archive Facebook messages or automatically transfer them to GMail. There’s also a question as to what/how you can upload (your content) to share via e-mail and what happens after that message is out of your hands, how to categorize/label it for record-keeping purposes (e.g. you can’t) and what the legal ramifications are if you do use the platform’s e-mail to conduct a deal and that falls through. The system was initially designed for in platform use; if the conversion to a Facebook.com e-mail domain is any indication, the service realizes how valuable its usage is or could be. I found this gem of an article which puts e-mail in the context of marketing value; incidentally, this is the same reason why the platform continues to make changes to its pages. The article is a little sarcastic, yes, but as we all come to realize sooner or later — nothing is every truly “free.”

Like many people who are public-facing, I have some privacy concerns about mixing personal time and pleasure with business. I’m no celebrity, mind you, but I have enough visibility and long-term goals that I want to try things out and continue to mold the business. To some extent, I’ve given up on pouring efforts into Facebook because I’ve seen and experienced significant financial/traffic/usability drop-offs as Facebook moves toward a pay-to-play environment. My motto with Facebook now is: if it (going viral) happens? It happens. I still use it, yes, even moreso than Google+, but it’s not as valuable as spending time pouring that same effort into some other way of connecting with readers — like a newsletter, for example. It takes time to build an audience and I think that’s why social media is so alluring, because it promises to be instantaneous without actually being instantaneous. Not to mention, story must come first.

Twitter I use for quick contact, person-to-person communication, getting in touch with people I need e-mails from (funny, but true!) updates, writing research, event/meet-ups, and mini-snippets. I love Twitter, but I have to manage it, because in the past it’s replaced blogging and I’m very bad about following up on favorited links. BAD WRITER GIRL. I don’t make business decisions via Twitter nor do I commit to anything there, partially out of respect for other people, and partially? Because I have no memory. I have multiple e-mail addresses, yes, but everything is coordinated through one service and I have a system in place should I need to retrieve something important. (I’m also working toward getting caught up on my filing, but that’s another story.) We may get the initial interest portion worked out, or I may share what I’m working on, or whatever. . . You know, in many ways Twitter is like hanging out at the bar at a convention. You can have all the bar talk you want, but until it goes through e-mail? It’s not a real business deal.

To some extent, there’s also an “age” factor. I say this with the greatest amount of love and sincerity, by the way, because I don’t feel that this is an “age” factor because of how old people are; I feel this has everything to do with technology levels of experience and when certain elements the user first encountered. In my experience, people who use e-mail to conduct business, proper punctuation and grammar, and follow submission guidelines and basic forms of politeness are taken more seriously. I can err on the side of formality, yes, but I’d rather be polite than risk coming across like a beyootch to someone I’m hoping to do business with and/or get money from. Even so, communication styles also depend upon the relationships of the people involved. (I had a funny conversation with someone about that last week. He asked me: “Why so stiff?” And then blunt Monica came out. And then all was well. But I feel people don’t get to be “at” that friendly/sarcastic/banter level right away. Certainly, there’s something to be said for getting to know someone and ensuring that e-mail tone is appropriately geared. As I’ve learned: e-mail tone is e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g.)

Anyway, that’s why I don’t use social media for business. It may not be a perfect solution on your end, but it’s what works for me. It’d be *very* easy to spend all day every day managing communication and parsing out personal, business, opportunities, etc. but the more I put that sort of thing first? The less the words flow, and the more chance I have of never getting done what I need to. It’d be different if I had an assistant, sure, but I’m not there yet. Even then, I feel that some things are just too important to be managed by a platform known for baby pictures and Failbook.

    Mood: Oh, so serious. Need to find a cat to snorgle.
    Caffeinated Beverages Consumed: There was something in my coffee, which now requires me to drink more of it.
    Work-Out Minutes Logged Yesterday: Stay on Target.
    In My Ears: A Japanese title I can’t pronounce correctly
    Game Last Played: Tetris
    Movie Last Viewed: The Raven
    Latest Artistic Project: In progress!
    Latest Release: “Fangs and Formaldehyde” from the New Hero anthology through Stone Skin Press
October 19, 2012
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Ramblings about Personal Bias Online

One of the comments someone made about what they want to read here, was about what makes me “me.” During Speak Out with Your Geek Out, I talked about how I’m a hobby anthropologist. *flexes fingers*

Yep, breaking that hat out today. One of the biggest challenges with online communication is the sheer volume of information we’re inundated with. And there’s a lot of it. The second biggest challenge? Your personal bias. A while back, I used to do a lot of keyword research on the day job, and I found that singular versions of search terms were almost always more popular than the plural. I think this is because the computer is such a singular experience physically. You sit down to your computer. You type on your keyboard. You chat or Tweet or message or e-mail on your account. The actions you take are yours. The words you type are yours. You, you, you.

(Or rather… Me, me, me.)

There’s a lot of “me’s” in online communication, which is why it’s so easy to forget that personal bias is common, rampant, and to be expected. What gets me, is the expectation part of personal bias and the hypersensitivity that results from that. Getting back to the whole “the internet is a singular experience” mindset, think about how this translates to what actions people take. Why does someone get pissed off when another person stops following them on Twitter? Why are there crappy comments on YouTube! videos, news sites, etc.? Why are people so gullible with respect to internet rumors?

It all comes back to bias and what that person is reacting to. I’ve seen incredibly nice people spit vitriol online. I used to wonder why that was, until I realized that they may be incredibly nice “in person” but remove the face-to-face contact and something changes. What you’re left with? Is that person’s mind or psyche. If you’re in a crappy mood and nothing is going right, then that colors how you view the world. Same goes for online, too. Only, it may not be clear who we’re talking to. How old are they? What cultural background do they have? Are they in the city or the country?

Similar to creating unique characters, when you start attaching other factors to a voice online, that voice is removed from the choir and becomes a soloist. When the only thing you have to go on is their words (and vice versa) they’re still part of the choir because they’re tapping into what you like, what you don’t, what you believe, and what you’re skeptical about. In other words, your ability to empathize is diminished because you’re hearing the words in the way you want to hear them. What you’re missing, is the “who” that’s speaking those words.

My solution to eliminating personal bias online is to take a page from the instructions I got as a kid. Mind you, these directions were to avoid getting hit by a car, but I think the same applies here.

Stop. Look. And listen.

I feel that the way we communicate online will continue to suffer the more rapidly our access to communication increases. Can’t tell you how many e-mail signatures I’ve seen lately that say something to the effect of: “I’m on my Blackberry. Responses are short. Please don’t take it personally.”

To explain every nuance in communication is nothing short of exhausting. To react emotionally to every nuance in communication is, in my mind, a consequence of hypersensitivity. Today, I had someone take a joke seriously. So I said: maybe I should start color-coding my words? When those misinterpretations happen, I feel that we begin to stray toward obsessive thinking about our words. Recently, John covered that concept in Dork Tower and based on the responses, I know I’m not alone in this.

Quite frankly, I obsess enough over my stories. I don’t want to fixate on every turn of phrase I post online, because that’s an exercise in insanity. It happens, though. Especially when someone doesn’t stop, look or listen to the “me” behind the words.

There are topics I avoid because I know what my buttons are. I do get a little frustrated when people feel compelled to edit my social media updates. It blows my mind when you see people criticize or edit other people’s Tweets by saying: “You should have…” Or “Company A has to…” or flat out corrects typos, etc.

What they’re really saying? “I prefer that you…” Or “I feel that Company A should…”

Again, it circles back to that personal bias. One of the lessons I learned from my hundred day experiment, is that the more connected I am, the worse my personal bias gets unless I catch myself. I feel this is universal. Maybe we could all use an internet detox every now and then?

I don’t understand why, when people are unhappy with a company, they post about it online assuming that company will pay attention. Customer service departments do exist. Unfortunately, many companies have struggled with how to best communicate online. Instead of coming up with a plan before they dive in, they react to situations. While that may work for some, the end result is bad PR. I know a few companies think that bad PR is better than no PR at all because you’re no longer invisible.

Recently, I sent a letter to Lego asking them about their board games and why the mini-figs were so small. I explained that I preferred a larger size because I wanted to use the figs in my fantasy game as miniatures. And they responded back explaining that the size of the figs was intentionally designed to match the size of the game. They also said that they do review suggestions internally. Makes sense to me. Their site was easy-to-use and the feedback loop was great!

So in addition to Stop. Look. And listen. I’d also offer: Ask. Language is ever-changing and it’s proving to be the Tower of Babel. A lot of us are saying something and we all want to be heard. But even with all these words, how many of us really understand what is being said?

Anyway, thanks for listening. Not sure if I’ve got any answers, but the hobby anthropologist in me had a blast.

October 28, 2011
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A Lesson from the Muskrat

Working with the Muskrat (aka John Kovalic) has been a lot of fun as we get the workflow side of things situated. We’ve been dealing with this pesky thing called “infrastructure” (I might have said that before) as well as firming up business relationships and letting people know that we’re now a team of two (as opposed to a team of one).

While I’ve been giving John options and new ways to deal with the business, he’s also taught me something, too. Short answer? The importance of a positive tone in e-mail. Long answer? Read on…

Every day, we’re bombarded with communication. If you work online, chances are you’re getting input from Twitter, Facebook, Google Plus, websites, forums, etc. That’s not including your phone, advertising, crappy drivers or bus passengers, etc. etc. etc.

Tone matters! The same words in the same e-mail changes tone if you add a smiley face or a friendly salutation. I’ve witnessed this time and time and time again. Sounds simple, doesn’t it? Maybe it is just that simple. Maybe we read into tone on e-mails without even realizing it. Yet, the world changes when we not only talk to people with a smile, but infer that as well.

Since I’ve adopted the Muskrat WayTM, I have noticed a difference in the exchanges I’ve had. No, this doesn’t mean you suck up to people, because really? Since when do I do that and well? All this is, is a reminder that it’s not a bad thing to seek out positivity where you can. It can make a difference in a world where there’s not enough smiley faces throughout the day.

Thanks, John!

October 11, 2011
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Freelance Writing Tip #12: Exercise Diplomacy with Editors

If you exchange angry words with one editor, you run the risk of tarnishing your reputation with other editors. (Just like writers befriend other writers; editors talk to other editors.) That’s not to say you shouldn’t stand up for yourself if you feel you are in the right about something. Speak up carefully, politely, and succinctly. Back up what you say, especially if you’re arguing about payment or copyrights. Eventually you’ll ferret out misunderstandings and, by remaining calm, you’ll eventually come out on top.

May 16, 2007
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Monica Valentinelli > communication

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